My son, if your heart is wise, My own heart also will be glad; and my inmost being will rejoice When your lips speak what is right. Proverbs 23:15-16
What should matter most to us when we think of our sons? I know for a period of my life what mattered most to me was seeing my sons excel at sports. I could have sadly rewritten these two verses with the following foolish edits. "My son, if you do well at football and soccer, my own heart also will be glad; and my flesh will rejoice when I can cheer at your games for your goals and touchdowns." (Dopey Father 23:15-16) First of all I want to state that I am not against sports or competitive activities. When God graciously broke me he still allowed my sons to compete in sports - and I continued to cheer for them on the sidelines. Oh, but how I grieved for the years that I had lost - and for the way I had skewed their minds on what was a priority in their lives. During that time period we set everything aside for their sports careers. We spent tremendous amounts of money following them all over the mid-south (which, by the way, put us into debt). I had my sweet wife miss church along with my sons, so that we could go wherever the coach told us to go. We basically had a very clear idol in our lives - and it is was the dream I had that maybe one day my sons could play college ball - or even make a pro team. But the most devastating problem that was growing all the time was the misplaced priorities that I was putting before my sons. My own lack of submission to the Lordship of Jesus Christ in my life - carried over into my son's lives. This story ends well - because of two things. First and foremost because of God's mercy and grace. But secondly, because of some serious repentance on my part - repentance and brokenness that led me back to a proper life under the Lordship of Jesus Christ - and with proper biblical priorities. Let me get back, though, to the proverb at hand. The father here is speaking of what makes his heart glad. The father here was glad, and later even rejoiced that his son had a wise heart. Wisdom was what this father valued most in his son. And it is a wisdom that sees life as God sees it. The father here lived to see his son one day with a very wise and discerning heart. He labored to see that one day his boy would be a man who longed to do the will of God above anything else in his life. This places before us a very important question. Are we as fathers seeing our most important job as laboring to see our sons become wise, godly young men? Wisdom comes from God. We learned this back in Proverbs 2. If we are going to have wise sons, it will be because we have taught them the things of God. Wise sons come from wise fathers who both know the Word and apply it in our everyday lives. The passion that often drives a "sports-dad" will be re-directed into being a "godly-dad." If the Christian fathers who spend hours trying to hone their son into the next Peyton Manning or the next Landon Donovan, would devote that much time to honing their sons into the next Paul - we'd watch a revolution in the church - and in our society in general. Instead of working on passing and catching skills alone - we'd find ourselves spending time also reading the Word with our child. We'd be working on wisdom skills - on memorizing Scripture - and on being able to take the Word of God an use it to properly discern good and evil as they walked through their lives. I know I may be laboring the point a little bit, but think about this for a moment. How many sons are actually going to be playing sports at the college level? How many truly have a shot at the NFL or MLB or the MLS? And how many who make it to those levels of sport will have a wise and discerning heart there to keep them out of the trouble that seems to be following sportsmen in these sports? The truth is very few will make it to these teams, but everyone single one of those young men will need to be able to live a life of wisdom. All of them - even those who do make it - will need "wisdom skills" to walk through life worthy of their calling in Jesus Christ. If you think your son will make it to a college or pro level - have at it. But Dad, make sure that the most important goal you have for your son is to live a life of wisdom an godliness! Make sure HE knows that this is the true goal - and that which would most delight your heart and soul! The father her also states that his inmost being will rejoice when he hears his son speaking what is right. The inmost being spoken of here is literally kidneys in the Hebrew. Dads, your kidneys need to rejoice over your son! Now there is a phrase you don't hear much anymore. "Hey Bob, man my kidneys just rejoice over how Bob Jr. is growing into a godly young man!" The kidneys were thought, along with the heart, to be the deepest seat of emotion and joy in a person. It referred to the innermost and most private part of a person's life. When you are moved to rejoice at that level, you are rejoicing at the deepest level possible. You rejoice because your heart is blessed at the core level of your beliefs and principles. This leaves me with another loaded question. What is your deepest rejoicing about in life? If you find yourself rejoicing deeply at the touchdowns and sports achievements of others - but yawning at the things of God - the exhibition of godly character and true manhood - you are rejoicing about the wrong things. Let me say, I love a good touchdown like most guys - but God has worked to where I get more excited when I watch my sons make godly decisions. The reason this father was rejoicing in his kidneys was because his son was speaking what is right. This is not that his son was parroting some phrase or some rote speech he knew would make dad happy, but that his son was speaking normally - and was saying what was right. This is an important step for our sons maturity wise. Jesus taught us that it was out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth spoke. So when we hear our sons speaking what is right in their normal conversation - it tells us that God has worked in their hearts. It is easy to get a son to say what YOU want him too when he is around you - but it is far more difficult to rear him to say the right thing (the godly thing) as a matter of normal living. This requires God working in his heart. That is why the father was dancing in his kidneys when he knew his son was speaking this way. Fathers, this proverb is vital for us to grasp. We are called to take boys given to us by God, and rear them to be men. This requires doing far more than just bringing home the bacon - and re-living our desires for sports grandeur through them. Taking a boy and making him a man requires that we put wisdom and godliness at the top of our own priority list, and helping our sons to do the same. It means laboring to see a heart-change in our boys by the working of the gospel and the Spirit of God. It means training our sons to love a woman properly - and to have a vision of what God desires for their lives to be. But I will tell you by the mercies of God that when you watch your sons begin to make godly decisions - no sports achievement in the world can come close to the sensation you will get in your kidneys! Live therefore for the glory of God and the blessing of your kidneys as you labor to take boys - and give the world men of God.
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Apply your heart to discipline And your ears to words of knowledge. Proverbs 23:12
This is a simple admonition here in Proverbs - and yet if we will look at it carefully, it will yield to us some very helpful information. The first thing we see is that we are to apply our heart to discipline. The word "apply" here means, "to bring to" - thus what God is saying to us is that we need to bring our hearts to something. Here we read that what we bring our hearts to is discipline. The word discipline is "musar" which means to instruct with discipline. It refers most often to the discipline given by a father - both by word and by the rod. It is very easy when discipline is applied to us for us to not allow it to reach the heart. We may hear the words - and receive the correction - but we do not bring our hearts to it. True correction and discipline is for the heart - not the bottom. It might be applied to the rear end with the rod - but the aim in these things needs to be directly to the heart. Those who protest the use of the rod see the issue being striking a child - and they see it as evil in all circumstances. But the godly parent is not aiming for the rear end alone. They want to instruct with their discipline. They want their words and their use of the rod to affect the heart of the child. If you have their heart - in the end you will truly change their behavior. What Solomon is saying though, is for the one receiving the discipline. Apply your heart to what God is trying to teach you. If you are like me - there are times when you bristle at discipline. It is not pleasant to have God apply the rod to us. It is not a delightful thing for us to be corrected and rebuked. But when God grants us discipline it is only for our best interests. We can be absolutely assured of this. Therefore we need to train ourselves to receive it joyfully - gratefully - and educationally. If we do, maybe we won't need a second dose of discipline to complete the job for us. The second admonition here is that we also apply our ears to words of knowledge. Knowledge here refers to more than just head-learning. Solomon is telling us about a knowing of God and His ways. He refers to a working knowledge - a practical knowledge - intimate knowledge - knowledge that truly changes the way we act. The verb "apply" is assumed here - thus we are told to bring our ears to this knowledge that God is seeking to give us. It is more than just hearing it - it is concentrated listening. It is listening to learn and to apply it to one's life. This is key to us becoming wise. If we will truly bring our hearts and ears to what God is seeking to communicate to us, we will be blessed greatly. God longs for us to be wise and to know and follow Him with all our hearts. These two practices - bringing our hearts to times of discipline - and bringing our ears to hear obediently what God says to us - will assure that we grow and personally experience all the godliness that God desires to give us when He works and speaks in our lives. POSTSCRIPT: Recently, individuals have quoted articles from this section and stated that we teach child abuse at Calvary Chapel Jonesboro. To this I feel the need to respond. First, biblically, we are told that if we have a problem with our brother to go to our brother - not the internet - and confront our brother. To date, these individuals have yet to contact me to discuss these things. That should say volumes in itself. Second, we do not teach child abuse at our fellowship. This blog is an endeavor to teach what is in the Bible for the edification and upbuilding of God's people. Anyone who has been to our fellowship knows that in our classrooms we administer NO physical discipline. We correct with words and with "time outs" and eventually with a report to parents. From our nursery throughout every age group our people are instructed NEVER to administer physical discipline. We believe this right alone belongs to a parent. Even then we teach the following about any application of physical discipline. Discipline is about the heart of a child. Physical or corporal punishment is ONLY to be administered in a spirit of love for the child. Teaching and loving verbal correction is key - as is prayer for the child's eventual salvation in Jesus Christ. Any physical punishment administered due to anger or rage is out of line and wrong. The parent is to discipline the child with appropriate discipline - not abuse. In the end the child should be taught - and in every circumstance hugged, loved, and prayed with after any physical punishment to assure them of our love. The idea of a "beating" is completely out of step with what the Scriptures are teaching. Instead the idea of loving discipline is intended. He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; He who keeps understanding will find good. Proverbs 19:8
How does the Bible teach us to love ourselves? Here is an interesting question because there are some who think that before we can ever love someone else, we have to love ourselves. Personally, I find that kind of teaching to be contrary to sound wisdom. The reason I feel this way is because those who are taught such things spend all their time going deeper inward to determine if they love themselves enough. The problem with this kind of psycho-babble is that happiness comes when we are no longer consumed with ourselves and learn to give our lives for others and for the glory of God. A person who constantly goes inward to determine if they love themselves properly will have precious little time to love others. It is usually a downward spiral that can lead to a person being consumed by a desire for their own happiness. Jesus said that if we love our lives we will lose them - but if we lose our lives for Him and for His kingdom's sake, we will gain them for all eternity. But this passage in Proverbs genuinely speaks of loving our own soul. So what exactly is God teaching us here? The translation here reads, "He who gets wisdom . . . " yet the actual word translated wisdom is the Hebrew word, "leb" which refers to the heart. What Solomon was seeking to say is that the one who gets a heart - the right kind of heart - loves his own soul. Here is where we need to grasp what the Bible says about our hearts. We learn from the whole counsel of Scripture some very interesting things about the human heart. First, we learn that our hearts are messed up due to the fall of man into sin. Jeremiah tells us that the heart is wicked and desperately evil, and is impossible to understand with our own wisdom. (Jeremiah 17:9) To plumb the depths of our hearts - without grasping the wickedness of sinful man - will get you no where. That is why secular psychology will yield very little in dealing with the true human condition. None of the major psychological constructs admits that man is a sinner - and that the real problem with humanity is a sin problem - a rebellion against God. The next thing we learn is that God Almighty can understand the heart - and has done what is necessary to change it and transform it. The change for the heart is available by faith in Jesus Christ. God takes out of us our heart of stone, that does not respond to God's Word or commandments. In its place God miraculously puts a heart of flesh that has the very commandments of God written upon it. Thus we are regenerated in Christ with a new heart and a desire to do what He commands. The other lesson that God teaches us in His Word is that once we are saved, our hearts and minds need to be renewed by the Word and the work of His Spirit. While we are here on earth, we will face temptation and a constant battle with the three enemies of our soul, the world-system, the flesh, and the devil. Because of the way that these three things want to influence our minds toward sin, it is imperative that we renew our minds with the truth - which is God's Word. Actually, this is the way we "get heart." We "get heart" when we begin to understand God's wisdom and God's ways. We no longer try in our own strength to deal with the myriad of temptations and trials that come to our hearts. We know that such an endeavor is doomed to be fruitless. Instead, we embrace what God has done in Jesus Christ. We embrace godly wisdom and understanding. As we do this we are actively loving our own soul! Remember that Jesus said that if we want to save our "fleshly" lives in this world - we will lose them. But the one who chooses to lose his soul - who dies to self - and who embraces a regenerated heart - that man loves himself in the end. He embraces an understanding of life that has conversion and regeneration at its core. As he does this - he finds good! He learns to die to himself - and die to the desires of the flesh. He learns that when his heart is drawn by temptation to a worldly point of view that he needs to reject it. He chooses instead to "not love the world or the things of the world." He goes to the Word of God to renew his mind so that he proves that the will of God is good, acceptable, and perfect. He faces the lies and deceit of the devil and learns to expose them for what they are. He chooses instead a life instructed by the Scriptures. He spends time in the Word so that he is walking with "understanding" at all times. The two words "keeps understanding" are very beneficial to know here. He "keeps" understanding points to the fact that he watches over it - guards it - and is constantly on the lookout for anything that would detract from God's ways and will in his life. He keeps "understanding" points to the fact that he desires a discernment from God on all things. The word "understanding" is the Hebrew "tebunah" which means to discern or understand how things differ. He looks at every choice wanting to discern the difference between his flesh and the Spirit of God. He wants to discern the difference between the kingdoms of this world vs. the kingdom of our Lord and His Christ. He longs to discern the difference between his own desires and those given by the Lord. He yearns to grasp the difference between sin and righteousness - between glorifying self and glorifying God. This is the way to love yourself. You love your own soul by protecting and guarding it from the tyranny of self. You choose instead to embrace God's wisdom in the heart. You decide that you will guard and protect yourself from anything that turns you even slightly from a life lived for the glory of God - from a life lived for the kingdom of God - and a life lived by the Spirit of God as He teaches and leads you by the Word of God. Want to love yourself? That is the way to do it! Haughty eyes and a proud heart, The lamp of the wicked, is sin. Proverbs 21:4
Two things that God hates are haughtiness and pride. They are actually two sides of the same sin - but nevertheless God really despises these things. We learn from this proverb that these two things are the very lamp that shines within the wicked - it is what they think gives them light and guidance. It should be a no brainer then why they are so blind to the things of God. Haughty eyes are the first thing mentioned here. The word for haughty here means something having height - and actually refers to the physical height of the heavens. In the oriental culture it was considered a good thing to cast your eyes down before a superior. It showed respect. To this day orientals show their honor and deference to someone by bowing to them and lowering their eyes. Thus to have lifted eyes - even eyes raised to the heights - is to be a very disrespectful and arrogant person. It is a way of saying that you recognize no greater authority in life than yourself. Everyone else is "below" you. A "proud heart" is also mentioned here. The word proud means something wide, spacious, and broad. When put with the word "heart" it came to mean someone arrogant - of a broad and prideful heart. One of the ways this speaks to us is that in biblical times someone who held a "broad" view of their morals and choices was someone who ignored the Scriptures and the Law - and chose rather to walk in the pride of their own desires (broad as they may be - yet still wrong!) rather than submit themselves to the Law of God and the boundaries it put on their actions and attitudes. When a man has arrogant eyes that refuse any authority but their own, and a heart that refuses God's Law - that person is wicked. This proverb tells us that this is the "lamp" of the wicked - these arrogant eyes and proud heart. The lamp refers to the light by which this person seeks to live. The psalmist prayed, "Send forth Your light and Your truth, let them lead me." This was his request - that the light and the lamp that shone within him would be in agreement with God's Word - God's Law. Thus, as this light shone within him - he would see to know where to go and what to do. But for the wicked, their light is their own arrogance and pride. The light that guides them utterly rejects God's authority over their lives - and God's Word that speaks what is truth and light. The result is that their lamp shows darkness and not light. They are blind as a bat when it comes to any kind of vision or any kind of ability to walk in God's ways. Oh, how we as believers need to reject in us eyes that are arrogant and lifted against God's authority in our lives. How we need to reject a heart that says that God's Word has nothing to say to us. If we want to be spiritually blind, these are the things we need to embrace - but if we want any kind of spiritual vision whatsoever - we need to reject anything that has to do with arrogance or prideful attitudes toward God or toward His Word. The refining pot is for silver and the furnace for gold, But the LORD tests hearts. Proverbs 17:3
In order to purify sliver it is put into a crucible or refining pot and heated to very high temperatures so that the dross can be scraped off the top. What is left is highly purified silver. Gold is similar in that the higher the purity the higher the value. Thus gold is put into a furnace to accomplish the same process. What this proverb says is that what the pot is to the silver and the furnace is to gold, God is to the hearts of men. We read in the New Testament of Peter's comments in this same vein. "In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ." (1 Peter 1:6-7) James also tells us of the blessing of testing and trial in our lives when he writes, "Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." (James 1:2-4). So according to both this proverb of God and the New Testament, the purifying process that God uses to test our hearts is a blessing. Why then do we have entire doctrinal systems in Christianity that disdain this process and only want health, wealth, and prosperity to be our lot? The answer to this is a lack of teaching that involves the entire counsel of God. Another reason for this also may be our affluent and oppulent lives in our world today. We seek to insulate ourselves from any bad thing happening to us - or any kind of negative setback. We have insurance and government protection to keep us from having the negative affect us too much. The problem is that God is absolutely committed to our hearts being refined so that we will be holy and godly men and women. What that means in the long run is that God is also committed to bankrupting our entire system if that is what is requires to eventually get to our hearts. There is a scary scenario - yet one that I fear is getting closer every day. God tells us in Romans that all things do work together for good for those who love the Lord and who live according to His ways and purposes. What many don't do is read the next several verses where God says that His purpose is that we are conformed to the image of His Son - that we become holy men and women whose character reflects that of Jesus Christ Himself. For fallen men and women that means testing. If we could hear silver and gold as it is put into the pot and the furnace - my guess is that they do not particularly enjoy the entire process - even though in the end they are refined and far more valuable. Neither do we find that process of trial and testing all that fun either. It is hard - and often it is stressful. It is a difficult thing to encounter - and many times it reveals rather embarassing sins in our lives. Yet as the dross is lifted off our hearts in this process - there comes out something that God can mightily use. Am I volunteering for trials and testings . . . no, but I know that if I want to draw nearer to the Lord and be further conformed into the image of His beloved Son, they are coming. It is just a comforting reminder that in this process the Lord does not have it our for me. To the contrary, this is done out of His utmost love and desire for me to know Him better and relect the heart of His son. Remember this next time you find yourself in the refining pot. He loves you through it all - and more than anything else, all this is working to show forth the glorious perfections of His Son within you. Do not be envious of evil men, Nor desire to be with them; 2 For their minds devise violence, And their lips talk of trouble. Proverbs 24:1-2
There are certain things that are repeated in Proverbs - certain aspects of life - certain issues that require reminders. One of those areas is the one addressed in these two verses. We need to beware of envying the wicked. But why would we envy them? One of the best places to grasp why is in Psalm 73 where the Psalmist temporarily lost his footing while envying the wicked. We envy wicked men because in this world their lives seem to be much easier and better. Often wicked men are successful in this age. Some achieve this because they cheat, steal, and claw their way to the top. Others just set their hearts on this world and what it offers - and don't take no for an answer till they have what they want. The psalmist looked at their lives and wondered why things were like this - how come the wicked seem to be catching all the breaks? The answer he came to only arrived when he went into the sanctuary and remembered God. Remembering God and the end of things brought sanity back to the psalmist. He considered the end of such men. They fell all at once - and their fall was often spectacular. They were consumed in an instant by death - and what awaits them beyone the grave is true, absolute justice. After seeing such horrific sights in God's presence the Psalmist decided it was better to serve God without all the worldly success - than to be evil, successful now - but ultimately impoverished and destroyed. God forbids jealousy toward evil men. Jealousy is easy when you see the successes here and now of the wicked. Their lives seem to be paved with butter and pastries. They have things we'd like to have - they have pleasures we think we would want. But God forbids this. When we become envious of the wicked - we start to want what they have. We think they have it made. Then we decide to hang around them because we like their stuff - their lifestyle - their buttered steps. Spiritual reality tells a different story though. The things they have that we want - how many of those things are the will of God for us? Men look at the playboy - or more recently the bachelor - and think, "Man, I'd love to have all those women fawning over me!" We look at the rich and famous and think, "If only I could have their wealth, their fame, their stuff - then I'd be happy." Here's a truth to remember - even they are not happy! They have their emptiness. At the highest point of my life in sin - I would come home from the parties - from the sex - from the pinacle of popularity and turn my face to the wall at night and long for something real. I would call out to God - asking Him to take away the emptiness of my heart. But here is another truth to remember - the more we look at them - and focus our thoughts and desires on what they have - the more we feed our flesh. In time, we will walk away from God, thinking that if we had a little of what they have - we'd be better off - happier. Oh, the devastation that comes from learning otherwise. I'm sure David thought that a night with the lovely Bathsheba would spice up his life. Samson proabably figured that a new relationship with that fox named Delilah is just what he needed to shake things up a bit. Absalom probably thought that being in charge himself would make his life better. Ahab figured that if he could just get Ahab's great garden spot he'd be content. Finally, Judas probably figured that he had those 30 pieces of silver coming to him after following Jesus 3 years - Jesus didn't seem to be offering a pay raise any time soon! Envying the wicked, their lifestyle and their stuff will get you into a load of trouble - because that's usually where they're headed - for trouble. Verse 2 here puts it bluntly to us. Their minds are working to devise violence - the word for mind here is the Hebrew "leb" which speaks of the heart. The Jewish concept of the mind is that it flows from the workings of our heart - our innermost desires. What a great picture is painted for us by the words used here. Devise is "hagah" and it means to growl, sigh, or mutter. It spoke figuratively of the meditation of the mind. In the wicked mind we hear growling. What are they growling about? We learn that their growling has to do with violence. The word here means violence, destruction - and is used to describe violence and havoc as social sins. This makes more sense to us when we put two and two together biblically. The evil man is living out the desires of his heart. His heart is given to himself and to the world and its desires. What he wants - he goes after - and he is absolutely committed to getting. Now take this reality and put it in the context of James chapter 4. "What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? You lust and do not have; so you commit murder. You are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel." (James 4:1-2, NASB) The evil man growls violence in his meditations because he cannot have what he wants - what he is lusting after - so he is willing to do violence (does not have to just be physical, could be moral as he does unethical things) to get them. This is the modus operadi for the evil man. Also his lips talk of trouble. Here is another interesting word in the Hebrew that describes the inner working of the evil man. Trouble is the word "amal" and it means something troubling. What is meant is that the evil man is constantly speaking of causing trouble. This guy is headed for trouble - and you hear him speak of it a lot. If you hang "with" him - you may "HANG" with him. Evil men exist. One of the facts of life is that there are those who are looking for trouble - and who cause it in life. What is fascinating is that we cannot relegate this to a socio-economic status or race. There are poor and rich alike - people of every racial background who just seem to breed trouble with their actions and attitudes. Some of these people can also have a life that may look glamourous and exciting on the outside - but beware - to travel with them or envy their outward status will only lead you into the same trouble and disaster. Better to steer clear of having them as close friends - or of desiring what they have. In the end - what they have is a coming disaster. Ask David - question Samson and Absalom - queerie Judas on this one. They'll all have the same answer - guard your heart! Now therefore, my sons, listen to me, And pay attention to the words of my mouth. Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, Do not stray into her paths. Proverbs 7:24-25
After giving a graphic description of the way a man falls into the trap of the harlot, the Holy Spirit gives a conclusion. God begins by having the father call for his sons to listen and pay attention. Here is a huge problem - and one I understand. Most people know the thing they should do - when it comes to adultery and to visiting a prostitute. The problem is not knowing - it is listening when someone is warning them. Therefore people have to be warned in a way that scares you to death. The first thing that is said to the son is that he does not need to turn aside to her ways in his heart. There is the first problem when it comes to men who get caught up in sexual immorality and adultery. Their hearts are the first thing to go. This manifests itself first in seeing their hearts no longer being given to the Lord. In the third chapter of Revelation Jesus says to the church that they've lost their first love - that love that draws them to the Lord and has them belong to Him more than anything else. I've seen this before in young people - old people - anyone who finds themselves drawn away to sexual sin. They start when they no longer have that passion for Christ. They turn to someone other than the Lord - looking for satisfaction - for something to fill their emptiness. They find that the Lord is not enough - and that they will actually find what they need in someone else. That is how a man allows himself to "turn his heart" to her ways. When his heart is gone - there is a real serious danger - because at that point he probably won't listen. It isn't too much to say - he can't listen - because his heart controls what his ears will listen to in life. Once he has strayed in his heart from the Lord - and into her ways - then he begins to stray into her paths. He begins walking without the normal cautions that he would have naturally. But worse than this is the fact that he is walking without the guidance of the Holy Spirit. He is grieving the Holy Spirit so his warnings are no longer being heeded. This is a very dangerous place to be. When he does stray into her paths - there will not be the protection that he normally has. Thus - it will be that much easier to fall into sin. Here is why we need to watch and pray for our chidlren - and honestly - ourselves as well. The issue is our hearts. That is what we are told earlier in Proverbs - watch your heart with all diligence - for from it flow the springs of life. This is so important - vitally important. THE most important thing that will keep you from falling into adultery and sexual immorality is to watch and guard your heart! All the ways of a man are clean in his own sight, But the Lord weighs the motives. Proverbs 16:2
Motives . . . everything can look great that a man is doing until someone begins to reveal his motives. I remember the first time the Lord revealed to me the issue of motives. It was like a light went on inside of my spirit. When the light went on, things did not look very pretty. In fact, things looked horrible the first time God decided to show me my motives in something I had done. If all we do is look at the outward acts of a man - most men will look fairly good. But why is this man doing what He does? Is there an ulterior motive behind all the good works that reveals a darker side to things? This is why Solomon says that even though a man's ways are clean in his own sight, the Lord is going to weigh the motives behind his deeds. It is like a man giving millions to a cause - for all the good press it will earn him in the eyes of men. Sure the money will still bless those who receive it, but the heart of the one who gave it is far from sterling. The word "motives" here is the word "ruach." It is plural, so the literal word means spirits. The Lord weighs the spirits involved in whatever acts that we do. The weighing the Lord does involves taking the act or acts and putting them through His "moral evaluation" where not the act itself is tested, but the spirit in which the act was done. It is possible to do the right thing the wrong way or with the wrong spirit. Such heart-searching is a minefield for humans because they are fallen and will usually think whatever they are doing is fine. That is why the verse says that in his own sight a man considers all his own ways clean (a word used to describe the objects used in worship of Jehovah in temple worship). We need God to reach into the deepest recesses of our spirit and reveal what is truly going on there. Then and only then can we know if an action in which we are engaging - a path we are taking - a word we are speaking - is the right or godly one. It takes going to the level of the work of the Holy Spirit to truly understand yourself. Only God Himself can test us to the level of our spirit. Thus, in the end, fellowship with God and walking in the fullness of the Holy Spirit is the only way to ensure that you are walking in a way that is pleasing to the Lord. Sheol and Abaddon lie open before the Lord, How much more the hearts of men! Proverbs 15:11
So, how much do you think God knows about you? How much do you think He knows about every person there is and ever has been? How we answer this question often will betray how we live as well. For the person who thinks of God in very low ways, God does not have a knowledge of everything going on in our world. This is especially true when it comes to themselves. God doesn't know everything about me - every thought and every motive. The result of such thinking is that such a person will sin more frequently and reason within themselves that God doesn't know what is going on in their lives. There is a problem with this thinking though - it is inaccurate. This proverb may seem strange to us at first - but it's purpose is very clear once we grasp what it is saying. Remember the fear of the Lrod is the beginning of wisdom. Thus we need to have adequate reasons to respect, honor, and fear Him. One of those reasons is the fact that everything lies open before Him. Nothing - including the thoughts and intents of our hearts is hidden from His sight. This One Who is Judge - knows every conceivable fact about our lives that can be gathered. Sheol is the place of the dead. That place lies open before the Lord. He knows everyone there - and everything about them. The place of the dead is not a mystery to God. He konws every intimate detail about those there - and about everything they did before they arrived. Even in death His knowledge is absolute. What seems to be the idea here is that no matter who you are - God knows all there is to know about you - even when you are dead. But what about those who reject Him - those who say either He does not exist, or if He does - that they offer Him no information about themselves? Well, that is an interesting question - and one which this passage answers. Abaddon lies open before the Lord. What is Abaddon? This is the place of the wicked dead. It means "destruction" and is the Old Testament equivalent to hell. This lies wide open to God. He knows everyone there - and knows all there is to know about them. Even those who reject Him - are known intimately by Him. There is an interesting statement made by some - that God is not present in hell. That is not Scriptural. He is there - but only in absolute judgment and wrath. Those in hell know God - but they only know Him in His wrath and judgment - and will only experience this for all eternity. He knows all about their rebellion and arrogance - and every last bit of it is reaping eternal destruction and devastation. Now, if Sheol and Abaddon lie open before God - where do you think this places the hearts of men still living today? Since God knows everything there is to know about everyone who has ever died - godly or ungodly - it is not a stretch to realize that every man's heart lies open before Him. What a comfort this is to those who seek Him - yet what a terror to those who think they can reject and shut him out of their lives. Yet that is the very purpose of this passage - this proverb. It is given to bring men to the terrifying realization that the One Who stands as their Judge - is One Who has absolute knowledge about them down the tiniest detail of their lives. To rebel against Him is the height of insanity. All their hearts are open before Him - and they will have to answer for every deed and word - every action and attitude - every mood and mood - every sin - all this will be at His instant disposal. This is meant to humble us - possibly even horrify us if we are living definantly toward Him. May He do His work through it to bring men to the end of themselves and to a point of repentance and faith in His only answer, Jesus Christ. For at the window of my house I looked out through my lattice, And I saw among the naive, And discerned among the youths A young man lacking sense, Passing through the street near her corner; And he takes the way to her house, In the twilight, in the evening, In the middle of the night and in the darkness. Proverbs 7:6-9
I find it not only interesting, but also highly instructive to see that God addresses the issue of sexual immorality several times in the opening chapters of Proverbs. Far from being a book that is out of date and not in step with the times, the Bible is very instructive to any generation that would pick it up and seek to learn from it. The current verses from Proverbs 7 read more like a script from a soap opera than they do the Bible - but that is the dig isn't it. The Bible does address the core corruptions of man - and does so with amazing clarity and color. That is why it can be so instructive if we will listen. This all starts innocently enough. The writer is looking out of the window of his home - through the lattice in the window to see what he can see at night. Again, typical evening in a typical town anywhere in the world. But that is where things, unfortunately in a typical fashion, become not just interesting, but instructive. He sees one "among the naive," one of the simple-minded ones. This is not a compliment - this one is simple-minded because as we will continue to see, he is NOT wise. As he looks he begins to discern something about this young man - he saw deeper than skin deep - and what he saw was not good. This was "a young man lacking sense." The word sense is interesting. It means he lacked heart - he was wanting and very needy - this young man did not have a heart for God - and his heart was in great need of change and transformation. When we get involved in sexual immorality we are among those who lack a heart for God. We are unwise and simple-minded to miss the danger in turning from God to our own fallen hearts. If we are going to stand against the wiles of the devil and those of the world, we need a heart for God. The fact is that these attacks - those that entice our flesh and our eyes and the pride of living our lives as we want - are some of the wicked one's most effective advances. It will take a heart that is regenerated and renewed to stand in these moments. And that is not what this young man possessed. Therefore we continue to read of his demise. We see what a heart that is not turned to the Lord does here. It may not run directly into sin - but it definitely does not take the principled road either. He takes his journey in a bad part of town - at least a bad part for those with sexual immorality issues in their lives. He does not flee sexual immorality as the Scriptures advise. He decides to "pass through" the street near to the immoral woman's house. He wants to flirt with evil - probably thinking he can handle it in the end. The fact is that he cannot handle it - and as he walks near her house - he suddenly finds that he is taking the way to her house. Here is wisdom for us in regard to sexual immorality. Stay FAR from temptation. There are times when temptation will come to you - and that is unavoidable. But for the vast majority of life - our proximity to temptation is a matter of our choice. Now, just because you are near to temptation does not mean you will succomb to it, but the closer you get to sinning - the more likely you will choose to sin. The wise man steers clear of the harlot's house. He stays away from the woman who flirts with him. He avoids the loose-moraled women of the world. But this young man reveals his total lack of discernment by heading near her house. Here is a piece of advice that will pay off for you if you will heed it. When you have a problem with an area of temptation, stay far away from it. When you have the thought that you can go near it - or you have a strong urge to go around it - put that thought out of your mind. This is the prelude to failure and acting out. God will not lead you "hang around" temptation. In fact He instructed us to pray that He would NOT lead us into temptation. When this young man took the way near her corner - he knew within that she would be there. Secretly - at least at a heart level - he wanted her to come out and meet him. To make such a calculated mistake is to make provision for our sin - something the Scripture expressly forbids. Some may read the previous paragraph and accuse me of prejudice and judgmentalism toward this young man. How could I make such strident comments about him? I make these comments because this young man is not fulfilling Scripture - he is ignoring it. Why would he make such choices? Why would he make them when it is twilight? There is a reason - a twofold reason. First, he has every intent in the recesses of his heart to walk in immorality. Why else would he go out near her house after the sun has set? Why would he wait until dark? Another thing we might not be aware of too is that this was the time when prostitutes and women of this type would go out to ply their trade among men who left their morals elsewhere. To go at this hour to this location was the height of folly - and the prelude to disaster as we see later. This young man lacks heart - that is the estimation given to us in verse 7 of this passage. He lacks the heart to stand firm in God's ways and avoid the pitfalls of his own flesh. He starts on a journey near her home deceiving himself of his intention to meet her. He gives in quickly when she arrives to deceive him. He is not dealing with his core corruptions - not being honest with himself that he is planning on being sexually immoral - and he is not being true to God's standards even as he sets out on his unwise course. The attitude of one avoiding sin is absent in his mind. If it was he would know that the wise man views sin as a plague - as a deadly wild beast whose only desire is to catch and devour him. If that were his mindset - he would have fled this scene instead of having walked into it. May God give us grace to do the same! |
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